The Daily Sucker

Submitter comments: Someone sent me this link. I’m sorry they did. There are so many banners and links, I didn’t know where to look first. It was easier to close the browser window.

Vincent Flanders’ comments: This site belongs to a category I call “Over the Top.” An “Over the Top” web site is just like pornography — you know it when you see it. Accept Jesus, Forever Forgiven! is the perfect example.

“Over the Top” web sites generally deal with philosophy, religion, and politics, but they’re not mainstream. Rush Limbaugh’s site would fall into the “Over the Top” category, except he’s mainstream (even so his site is just a smidgen away from being a Daily Sucker).

While the Jeff Rense Program site is world’s away from the “Accept Jesus” site, it makes use of the stereotypical lime green text intermingled with yellow text. Some text is centered, while other text is flush left and, of course, the page goes on forever. The background for the subpages looks straight out of 1996.

I also don’t know whether to be frightened by or jealous of Mr. Rense’s hair.

Jeff Rense Program

Submitter comments: This website is not too bad, but the designers have not bothered reducing the dimensions of their images. As a result, some of the pages are a few MB in size!

Vincent Flanders’ comments: I don’t know if I’d say it isn’t too bad. There are some serious contrast issues, especially with the text in the upper, right-hand corner of the pages.

The home page comes in at a svelte 785Kb. The “Table and Desk Lamps” page weighs in at almost 11Mb. Whatever the reason, this is just wrong.

Light My House

Vincent’s apology: Tuesday’s second sucker had the wrong link. Interestingly, it wasn’t the previous day’s sucker but a site that certainly doesn’t suck. To make matters worse, I was gone all day so I didn’t “catch” the mistake. The entry has the right URL, but I’m repeating it here.

Submitter comments: I was hoping to find some useful info here, but the way they have this laid out it could very well take days.

Vincent Flanders’ comments: It might even take weeks. Anytime you have a 4.81Mb web page, you know your site has problems. It would take world class skills to find what you were looking for on this site and I certainly don’t have them. I barely know where the wiper fluid container is in my car.

This site celebrates the return of the beveled graphic.

4L60-E

Submitter comments: I was doing some research on police web sites and came across a link on Google, “The Seekonk Police Department web site sucks #27. … It turns out I used this site as an example of bad web design back in October 2000. Guess what? …”

Since I have looked at some of the sites listed on your website in the past I couldn’t help but take a peek. The Seekonk Police website is bad but I may have one for you that is even worse. Check this out from Douglas County Missouri.

P.S. Try to right click on some text.

Vincent Flanders’ comments: Interestingly, my daughter and I were watching the latest Reno 911 DVD tonight (background on the show) and it occurred to me that today’s Daily Sucker is just the type of site that this mock police department would have up and running.

Today’s sucker uses every cop cliche I’ve ever seen (including the theme from Bad Boys). The animated bullets being “fired” on the home page are not the kind of message you want to see on your local police department’s web site. This tacky technique reminded me of one of the bonus features on the DVD — Cop Psychology Inside the Minds of Reno’s Deputies.

The different officers were interviewed by a psychologist/psychiatrist and the question that was asked of everyone was “Under what circumstances do you feel deadly force is justified?” The answers are hilarious. I’ve provided a link to one of them and it’s TOTALLY NOT SUITABLE FOR WORK (or for those folks who have a sophisticated sense of humor or are easily offended).

Just as you wouldn’t want your local cops to spout the same nonsense as Lt. Dangle about deadly force, you don’t want your local police web site to use animated bullets.

Today’s sucker is how cop sites used to look like in the old days. The problem is “these are the new days” and this site proves that police brutality doesn’t always involve a billy club.

Douglas County Sheriff’s Department

I’ve just gone through the first six months of Daily Suckers — trust me, it will make you ill — and I’ve come up with 47 of the worst:

Worst Web Sites of 2008: Contenders 1-10

Worst Web Sites of 2008: Contenders 11-20

Worst Web Sites of 2008: the rest of the contenders

Enjoy <grin>