April 26th, 2011 9:09 pm by Vincent Flanders
Submitter’s comments: Not a spinning Earth, just a spinning moon with a rising sun.
A reminder of how that term “Flashturbation” got its start. At least they knew they needed to enable us to skip that nonsense.
Vincent Flanders’ comments: Well, actually they have a Skip Intro button, but it’s at the bottom of my laptop screen and doesn’t show up. There are a lot of serious mistakes made here that were documented in Biggest Mistakes in Web Design 1995-2015.
1. Believing people care about you and your website. Some of the worst writing on the web is on this website.
Breakout Results, LLC is a highly qualified, proven, game-changing leadership team with an unrelenting passion for leading its client companies to a brighter future with higher standards of excellence, robust top-line growth–and superior bottom line performance.
This is crappy, cliche-filled writing and everybody except the authors of this site know it. Visitors to your site want their problems solved. This text is made for the company–not its customers. People don’t give a left-handed flying farkle about you, your business, or your mother. They want their problems solved now.
This mission statement crap can be summarized as, “All babies must eat.”
2. A man from Mars can’t figure out what your website is about in less than four seconds. I read a lot of the first page. I don’t have a clue what these people do and how they can solve my problems.
4. Using design elements that get in the way the sale. Flash fits the bill.
9. Site lacks Heroin Content. There is nothing on this website that will make me want to come a second time.
13. Misusing Flash. You should read the article, but the bottom line is there’s nothing here that couldn’t be done better with HTML and CSS.